Safe and unsafe

How often do you take a few minutes to assess your situation before speaking freely with anyone?

For us?  That happens quite often.

Living in a red state is what it is.  I mean, we knew moving here there would be times we weren't safe.

It is just weird thinking about it all in a writing space.

It is weird walking into a new restaurant and wonder if the people are staring at us because we are new or because we are gay.

It is weird walking into a shopping center and wondering if the people are staring at us because our daughter is so beautiful or because we are gay.

It is weird sitting at a new doctor's office wondering if it's going to be a safe place to mention I have a husband, not a wife.

It is weird searching for a dentist that you don't have to call your husband your friend... or that his staff doesn't interject that before you get a chance to answer.

It is weird, but it is also infuriating.

I get so mad listening to people talk like we can't hear them.

Knowing full well we can hear them.

I get mad when little kids who are parroting their parents called us faggots.

I get mad when little kids at the pool can't seem to understand but then yell to their parents "Mama, they married!  They gay!" as loud as they can.  It wasn't a nice acknowledgement either.

I get mad knowing my daughter will be impacted by people's bigotry against us and our family.

I get mad knowing we may have a harder time growing our family due to bigots and assholes.

I get mad, but I try to stay hopeful.

Hopeful that we can be an example of a boring, everyday gay family doing everything that straight family does.

Hopeful that we can raise our child/ren in a manner that they can brush off the negative bullshit.

Hopeful that we can live to see a day where I don't have to lie to my dentist for fear he'll fuck my mouth over.

Hopeful that the seeds of change are being planted in the younger generation.

Hopeful that someday, a generation of children don't have to hide who they are, nor come out to anyone, because we've helped normalize gay in the world.

Hopeful that by just being us, a child can grow up to just them themselves.

Everyone should live their truth.